In the third and final part of our Positive Attitude Series, Kevin Teers, Account Director at FMI offers his thoughts on Understanding Positivity.

‘Positive Thinking’ is a term that we hear so often these days and countless books, articles, studies, seminars and the like are available on the subject. However how many people fully understand positive thinking and its meaning?

We meet a lot of people throughout our lives, both personally and professionally, who would describe themselves as positive. It is a term regularly used in interviews by job applicants for example, but the reality can often be different once you get to see the person in action.

The common misconception is that being positive is just about being happy and smiley all the time. However, ‘smiley’ people can often be found to be negative once faced with certain situations or tasks. Similarly (although it is rare), people who might appear less happy on the surface can be seen to approach the same tasks and situations in a more positive manner.

First of all, we need to define positivity:

Positivity is the frequent experience of pleasant emotions. Some of the most common are: joy, hope, gratitude, interest, serenity, pride, amusement, love, inspiration, and awe.

No-one can actually be happy all of the time (and anyone that says they are is probably lying!) but you can always be positive. People with a true understanding of this understand that it does not mean avoiding or glossing over bad things that happen. Let’s be honest, bad things happen to all of us at different times in our lives. Instead, it involves making the most of bad situations, seeing the best in other people, and viewing everything in a positive light. Put simply, positive thinking just means approaching situations and challenges with a positive outlook.

Research indicates that the benefits of positivity occur when our ratio of positive-to-negative emotions is at least 3-to-1. So we need 3 positive experiences to every negative one in order for this positive state to exist. Typically, we cannot control when bad things happen. However, we can control our response to them. We can also control certain positive emotions and when we feel them. Sometimes we need to create these for ourselves in order to maintain this 3-to-1 balance.

So, how do we do this? Everyone will have their own methods of creating positive emotions that work for them. Some of the most common include:

• Make a choice – being positive when faced with adversity is a choice that you make. It is actually easier to choose to be negative, and human nature dictates this. As is the case with many choices though, the harder choice often leads to the best result.

• See the lessons in every situation – find the silver lining in every cloud. Looking for the bright side in every situation will improve your positive outlook.

• Find small positives – Each day look for things that will make you smile.

• Practice – Negativity is a learned behaviour in the same way that positivity is; it is a bad habit no different to smoking or other bad habits you may have. It takes time and effort to kick the habit but the rewards are worthwhile!

• Hang out with positive people – Find people whose positivity you admire. Spend time with them – watch and learn how their behaviour dictates this positivity and allow it to rub off on you.

• Use external inspiration – Whether you’re inspired by quotes, stories, motivational speakers, how and why famous people became successful in their fields, they are a great way to inspire yourself to achieve your goals.

• Affirmations – Affirmations are simply a declaration of something that is true. If you need to, develop a personal mantra that you can repeat to yourself (in your head of course, otherwise you may look a little strange!) when you need to maintain a positive outlook.

The Tetris Effect

Even as something as simple as the game of Tetris, or many of the other popular phone based games such as Candy Crush, or (for those of us old enough to remember!) Snake from the Nokia phones can teach us a great deal about how our brains adapt.

Anyone who has spent any length of time playing such games will know that once you finish playing, your brain continues to think about the game and how it’s played; so much so that many of us will have had dreams about playing them.

A professor of psychiatry at Harvard University, Robert Stickgold, noticed something similar after a day hiking a mountain in Vermont. That night, he dreamt that he was still mountain hiking and clinging to rocks. His curiosity gave rise to an experiment; he got a group of college students to play Tetris and sleep in the Harvard sleep lab.

Over 60% of the study participants reported dreams of images of Tetris pieces falling, rotating, and fitting together. Interestingly, half the participants that could be described as expert Tetris players reported such Tetris dreams while 75% of the novices did. The mind was continuing to work on making sense of the game during sleep. This also shows us that the more we practice something, the less time we have to spend, and the less energy we have to use, thinking about it. It starts to become more natural, and eventually becomes second nature.

So the game of Tetris can have a scientifically measurable effect on our brains. Applying this to the current topic it shows that the impact of regularly practicing a positive way of thinking and behaving can be even more powerful.

So many of us strive to think and act positively in our everyday lives, but few are able to consistently achieve it. The key is to never stop practising!

Be in love with your life – every minute of it!